There is nothing better than realizing, right after you wake up, that you won't have to face repercussions for the terrible choices you made in your dream.
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Entradas
Too bad alcohol isn't heavily discounted the day after St. Patrick's Day the way candy is after Valentine's Day.
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Harry Potter was a trust fund jock who married his high school sweetheart and became a cop.
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You could write a popular show by releasing a cryptic, big budget, highly promoted teaser trailer and then lifting all the major plot points from fan theories on the Internet.
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Using a dollar bill as a book mark is cheaper than buying a bookmark.
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The fact that the death of a scientist is headline news worldwide is in some ways the most fitting tribute Stephen Hawking could possibly have.
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If boys screamed at girl bands the way girls scream at boy bands it would be terrifying and hilarious
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It’d be cool if we could “close our ears” the way we can close our eyes. It’d make sleeping a lot easier.
As long as you don’t live in an area where you get killed in your sleepAnd like it’d prolly keep lil spiders from climbing in your ear while you sleptAnd it’d help with construction sites and other loud places via /r/Showerthoughts http://ift.tt/2tI0FhJ As long as you don’t live in an area where you get killed in your sleep And like it’d prolly keep lil spiders from climbing in your ear while you slept And it’d help with construction sites and other loud places
Owning a pet would be ten times cuter if we could make them laugh.
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This "Spring Forward" thing would be a lot more popular if we moved the clocks ahead at 2PM on Monday.
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Being a blacksmith must have been a real pantydropper back in the day seeing how Smith is the most common surname today.
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Depression is like wanting to go home but already being there.
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When dating, we tend to view others as a finished product while we view ourselves as a work in progress
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Someone, somewhere has the highest win percentage of 'Rock, Paper, Scissors' in the world and doesn't even know it.
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Accidentally liking someone's post while snooping through their profile is the digital equivalent of stepping on a twig while sneaking through the forest.
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The Oscars are literally a bunch of rich people telling themselves how awesome they are.
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We've seen The Simpsons' predictions come true, but we'll have to wait until the year 3000 to know if Futurama accurately predicted anything.
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The world is not getting worse, the data is getting better.
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Gravity is creepy when you realize you’re not walking around on a surface, but getting pulled into a burning core of magma
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parents spend the first 18 years scaring their kids into not getting pregnant, and the next 20 wondering why they wont
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